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Ever feel that your relationship suffers from a unique brand of frustration, tension, distance, or any number of other troubling feelings? The reality is, there is struggle in every romance. "If you are experiencing disillusionment, well, join the human race" . 你是否曾经感觉自己的感情曾经遭受沮丧，紧张，距离或其他负面情绪的困扰？事实是，在每段感情中这些纠结都不可避免。“如果你正在经历这种幻灭，那么说明你和大家都一样” 。 Hendrix, author of the best selling book, Getting the Love You Want, started examining the question, "why do couples fight" in the late 1970s. After studying and working with thousands of couples, he has found that there are 10 common bad habits couples engage in that make relationships miserable and can lead to break-up or divorce. 畅销书《相爱一生》的作者Hendrix在上世纪70年代末开始研究这个问题，“夫妻间为什么会有争斗”。在对几千对夫妻进行了研究和共事之后，他发现，那些婚姻悲剧的夫妻有10个共同的坏习惯，这可能导致他们分手或离婚。 1. Be critical. 太严苛。 Even "constructive" criticism can make your partner defensive and reduce the feeling of safety in a relationship. Being harsh and judgmental when angry can trigger a "flight or fight response." 哪怕是“建设性”的批评也会让你的伴侣产生抵触情绪，并降低二人关系之间的安全感。过于严厉和主观，会让愤怒引发一场“战斗或战斗反应”。 | 
