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Reader question: Please explain this sentence: Since I did not want to rub it in, I did not share with her what I am going to tell you. My comments: Sounds like a relationship problem. First, to paraphrase: “I” am going to tell you something that “I” did not tell her – lest she feels even worse. In other words, that person did not tell her some hurtful truth. For example, he broke up with the girl. She was hurt and wanted to know why he broke up with her. He found a new girl, that’s why. But he could not tell her that. He could tell her that because if he told her so she would probably feel even worse. That’s why he said he did “not want to rub it in” – this is the key phrase to grasp here – and that means he did not want to intensify her feelings of hurt by telling her the blunt truth. And so he was just being kind. Kind? Well, at this particular point in time, it’s probably hard for her to imagine him to be kind but time will heal. Soon enough will forget about this unhappy episode. She will find a new boy and move on. Anyways, I am just making up an example to illustrate the point of rubbing it in. To “rub it in”, you see, is literally to rub salt into a wound, which may intensify the pain ten fold. We variously hear people say “Do not rub it in their face”. Same thing. If you win, for instance, do not gloat in front your defeated opponent. The defeat, to your opponent, is embarrassing enough without your keep pointing it out to them. So maintain your composure and be generous in victory. One day you will lose, and when you do, you will understand – You won’t want your winning opponent to rub it in your face either. | 
