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[其他] 不需要太多,孩子只想要一句鼓励

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It's hard to make children do what's good for them when they've go to the ideas. Author and psychotherapist Gael Lindenfield shows how pressing the right buttons can make a lasting contribution to your child's wellbeing.

当孩子思想不通时,很难使他们做对他们自己有益的事。作家兼心理治疗学家盖尔-林登费尔德向你揭示了下列可能对你的孩子的健康成长具有持久影响的正确方法。

Physical force or threats may make children do as they're told in the short term but their compliance will last only as long as the threat is relevant. Then they will go back to doing what they wanted to do in the first place.

强制或威胁也许能使孩子暂时惟命是从,但也仅仅限于威胁起作用的时候。过后,他们又回到原来想做的事上去。

The parental approval ploy--"Mummy will be so pleased" or" Daddy would be so proud of you"--may have limited success when they're small but it won't work on teenagers, whose strongest motivation is parental disapproval. This sort of eager-to-please passivity is not likely to impress a future boss looking for ago-getter.

父母采用赞许的办法——如:“妈妈会非常高兴”或“爸爸会为你感到自豪”——在孩子很小时有时也许能奏效,但对十几岁的少年却不起作用,这个年龄段的孩子做事总是与父母的意见相悖。这种对“急欲取悦别人”的否定心态将来找工作可就难了,它不可能给老板留下好印象,因为他要的是富有事业心的人。

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