名师点评网友BEC初级作文(2)

　　本期作文题目：

　　Formulate a smoking policy for your office which is fair to both smokers and nonsmokers. Write a 40-50 word memo informing all staff of the policy.

　　提示：

　　我们需要确定，如果我是公司职员，我要在这篇memo中获得什么信息?是不是要知道：

　　1.新的吸烟政策从什么时候开始;

　　2.吸烟区划定在什么地方?

　　网友作文一：

　　TO: All Employees

　　FROM: CEO, Willan Smith

　　SUBJECT: NEW SMOKING POLICY

　　For all the employees, especially smokers,[1] plz be aware that our companys new smoking policy has been formulated as follow: A main smoking areas going to be restricted before Next MONDAY[2], anyone is not allowed to smoker in non-smoking zone even in the washing room.[3]

　　Plz target the smoking and non-smoking area and stick to the companys new policy.[4]

　　Thx.

　　名师指导：

　　[1]去掉，抬头已经写过给所有的员工，所以直接从正文开始就行了，费这个事干什么?

　　[2]时间不确切，最好是 from next Monday. Before 这个期限是什么时候?如果不能给出确切信息，就不要说，还不如换成具体的吸烟区域更好: be restricted to the room next to the toilet.