恋爱婚姻家庭:婚姻咨询师不希望你知道的小秘密
<p><span word="Things">Things</span> <span word="Your">Your</span> <span word="Marriage">Marriage</span> <span word="Counselor">Counselor</span> <span word="Doesn">Doesn</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="Want">Want</span> <span word="You">You</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="Know">Know</span></p><p>婚姻咨询师不希望你知道的小秘密</p><p><span word="If">If</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="knew">knew</span> <span word="these">these</span> <span word="things">things</span>, <span word="you">you</span> <span word="wouldn">wouldn</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="need">need</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="marriage">marriage</span> <span word="counselor">counselor</span>, <span word="would">would</span> <span word="you">you</span>? <span word="Those">Those</span> <span word="words">words</span> <span word="comes">comes</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="few">few</span> <span word="famous">famous</span> <span word="psychologists">psychologists</span>, <span word="psychotherapists">psychotherapists</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="doctors">doctors</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="marrige">marrige</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="family">family</span> <span word="counseling">counseling</span>.</p><p>如果你了解了以下内容, 就用不着婚姻咨询师了。以下是来自几位在婚姻家庭咨询方面非常著名的心理学者、专家的话。</p><p>1) <span word="I">I</span> <span word="love">love</span> <span word="couples">couples</span> <span word="who">who</span> <span word="fight">fight</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="waiting">waiting</span> <span word="room">room</span>. <span word="At">At</span> <span word="least">least</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="still">still</span> <span word="care">care</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="each">each</span> <span word="other">other</span>. <span word="If">If</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="or">or</span> <span word="both">both</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="seem">seem</span> <span word="indifferent">indifferent</span>, <span word="my">my</span> <span word="job">job</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="lot">lot</span> <span word="harder">harder</span>.</p><p>我喜欢看到在客厅吵架的夫妻。起码这表示他们还在乎对方。如果其中一方或双方都对对方漠不关心，情况就更加棘手了。</p><p>2) <span word="When">When</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="say">say</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="feelings">feelings</span> “<span word="just">just</span> <span word="aren">aren</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="there">there</span> <span word="anymore">anymore</span>,” <span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="you">you</span>’<span word="re">re</span> <span word="probably">probably</span> <span word="cheating">cheating</span>.</p><p>如果你说，你已经对对方没有感觉了。我知道你很可能在说谎</p><p>3) <span word="Sometimes">Sometimes</span> <span word="I">I</span>’<span word="ll">ll</span> <span word="tell">tell</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="couple">couple</span> “<span word="no">no</span> <span word="sex">sex</span> <span word="until">until</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="next">next</span> <span word="session">session</span>. <span word="Don">Don</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="touch">touch</span> <span word="each">each</span> <span word="other">other</span>, <span word="period">period</span>.” <span word="What">What</span> <span word="I">I</span>’<span word="m">m</span> <span word="really">really</span> <span word="hoping">hoping</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="they">they</span>’<span word="ll">ll</span> <span word="fail">fail</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="feel">feel</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="sense">sense</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="unity">unity</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="mutual">mutual</span> <span word="rebellion">rebellion</span>.</p><p>有时，我会告诉一对夫妻：“这个阶段就别同房，别碰对方了，就这样。”但其实我希望他们做不到，希望他们一起违背这个建议，拥有一种凝聚的感觉。</p><p>4) <span word="It">It</span> <span word="may">may</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="feel">feel</span> <span word="better">better</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="talk">talk</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="marriage">marriage</span> <span word="issues">issues</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="friend">friend</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="things">things</span> <span word="worse">worse</span>. <span word="Never">Never</span> <span word="talk">talk</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="outsiders">outsiders</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="things">things</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="marriage">marriage</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="haven">haven</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="already">already</span> <span word="talked">talked</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="spouse">spouse</span>.</p>
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