Some Olympic events just plain lame
<p><span word="A">A</span> <span word="recent">recent</span> <span word="international">international</span> <span word="poll">poll</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="sports">sports</span> <span word="journalists">journalists</span> <span word="identified">identified</span> <span word="race">race</span> <span word="walking">walking</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="dressage">dressage</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="inane">inane</span> <span word="events">events</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Summer">Summer</span> <span word="Olympic">Olympic</span> <span word="Games">Games</span>, <span word="which">which</span> <span word="open">open</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="Aug">Aug</span> 5 <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Rio">Rio</span> <span word="de">de</span> <span word="Janeiro">Janeiro</span>.</p><p><span word="OK">OK</span>, <span word="maybe">maybe</span> <span word="that">that</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="bit">bit</span> <span word="misleading">misleading</span>. <span word="The">The</span> “<span word="international">international</span> <span word="poll">poll</span>” <span word="actually">actually</span> <span word="consisted">consisted</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="Canadian">Canadian</span> (<span word="yours">yours</span> <span word="truly">truly</span>), <span word="two">two</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span>, <span word="a">a</span> <span word="Brit">Brit</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="an">an</span> <span word="American">American</span> <span word="swilling">swilling</span> <span word="beer">beer</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="bar">bar</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Lido">Lido</span> <span word="while">while</span> <span word="tossing">tossing</span> <span word="out">out</span> <span word="suggestions">suggestions</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="Most">Most</span> <span word="Boring">Boring</span> <span word="Olympic">Olympic</span> <span word="Event">Event</span> <span word="Ever">Ever</span>.</p><p><span word="Notice">Notice</span> <span word="we">we</span> <span word="didn">didn</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="say">say</span> “<span word="non">non</span>-<span word="athletic">athletic</span>” <span word="or">or</span> “<span word="stupid">stupid</span>.” <span word="From">From</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="perspective">perspective</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="ardent">ardent</span> <span word="armchair">armchair</span> <span word="critics">critics</span>, <span word="we">we</span> <span word="respectfully">respectfully</span> <span word="limited">limited</span> <span word="our">our</span> <span word="mockery">mockery</span> <span word="to">to</span> “<span word="boring">boring</span>” <span word="and">and</span> “<span word="lame">lame</span>.”</p><p><span word="That">That</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="say">say</span> <span word="these">these</span> <span word="events">events</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="devoid">devoid</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="skill">skill</span> – <span word="far">far</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="it">it</span>. <span word="With">With</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="itsy">itsy</span>-<span word="bitsy">bitsy</span> <span word="strides">strides</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="spastic">spastic</span> <span word="arm">arm</span> <span word="movements">movements</span>, <span word="Olympic">Olympic</span> <span word="race">race</span> <span word="walkers">walkers</span> <span word="must">must</span> <span word="attain">attain</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="cadence">cadence</span> <span word="comparable">comparable</span> <span word="to">to</span> 400-<span word="meter">meter</span> <span word="sprinters">sprinters</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="order">order</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="reach">reach</span> <span word="optimum">optimum</span> <span word="speed">speed</span> – <span word="and">and</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="do">do</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="non">non</span>-<span word="stop">stop</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="hours">hours</span>, <span word="in">in</span> 20- <span word="and">and</span> 50-<span word="kilometer">kilometer</span> <span word="competitions">competitions</span>.</p><p><span word="Race">Race</span> <span word="walking">walking</span> <span word="might">might</span> <span word="look">look</span> <span word="ridiculous">ridiculous</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="any">any</span> <span word="Olympic">Olympic</span> <span word="sport">sport</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="has">has</span> <span word="only">only</span> <span word="two">two</span> <span word="rules">rules</span> <span word="deserves">deserves</span> <span word="grudging">grudging</span> <span word="respect">respect</span>. <span word="The">The</span> <span word="first">first</span> <span word="rule">rule</span> <span word="dictates">dictates</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="competitor">competitor</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="back">back</span> <span word="toe">toe</span> <span word="can">can</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="leave">leave</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="ground">ground</span> <span word="until">until</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="heel">heel</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="front">front</span> <span word="foot">foot</span> <span word="has">has</span> <span word="touched">touched</span>, <span word="while">while</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="second">second</span> <span word="stipulates">stipulates</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="supporting">supporting</span> <span word="leg">leg</span> <span word="must">must</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="fully">fully</span> <span word="straightened">straightened</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="contact">contact</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="ground">ground</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="remain">remain</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="position">position</span> <span word="until">until</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="body">body</span> <span word="passes">passes</span> <span word="directly">directly</span> <span word="over">over</span> <span word="it">it</span>. <span word="Go">Go</span> <span word="figure">figure</span>.</p><p><span word="But">But</span> <span word="what">what</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="deal">deal</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="dressage">dressage</span>? <span word="Why">Why</span> <span word="do">do</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="riders">riders</span> <span word="take">take</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="credit">credit</span> (<span word="and">and</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="medals">medals</span>) <span word="when">when</span> <span word="it">it</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="horses">horses</span> <span word="who">who</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="real">real</span> <span word="athletes">athletes</span>?</p>
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