2017届高考英语一轮复习写作技能培优课件：第4讲 巧妙遣词造句，实现升级策略（牛津译林版）
<p> 第四讲 巧妙遣词造句，实现升级策略 (2017·高考新课标全国卷Ⅱ)一家英语报社向中学生征文,主题是“十年后的我”。请根据下列要点和你的畅想完成短文。 1．家庭； 2．工作； 3．业余生活。 注意：1.词数100左右； 2．可以适当增加细节，以使行文连贯； 3．开头语已为你写好。 <span word="I">I</span> <span word="often">often</span> <span word="imagine">imagine</span> <span word="what">what</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="life">life</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="future">future</span>. _____________________________________________________ 满分作文： _______________________________________________<span word="would">would</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="give">give</span> <span word="an">an</span> <span word="excellent">excellent</span> <span word="picture">picture</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="future">future</span> <span word="life">life</span>(很好地描绘我未来的生活) <span word="in">in</span> <span word="ten">ten</span> <span word="years">years</span>.<span word="To">To</span> <span word="begin">begin</span> <span word="with">with</span>(首先)，<span word="I">I</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="every">every</span> <span word="effort">effort</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="take">take</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="care">care</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="family">family</span>，<span word="especially">especially</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="aged">aged</span> <span word="grandfather">grandfather</span> <span word="because">because</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="has">has</span> _________________________________________________①(奉献大部分生活养育两代人)．_________<span word="work">work</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="concerned">concerned</span> (就工作而言)，<span word="I">I</span></p><p> <span word="am">am</span> <span word="determined">determined</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="become">become</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="film">film</span> - <span word="maker">maker</span>②____________ (那种情况下)，<span word="I">I</span> <span word="shall">shall</span> <span word="direct">direct</span> <span word="many">many</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="movies">movies</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="audience">audience</span>.<span word="During">During</span> <span word="holiday">holiday</span> <span word="seasons">seasons</span>，<span word="I">I</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="live">live</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span></p><p> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="often">often</span> <span word="imagine">imagine</span> <span word="what">what</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="life">life</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="future">future</span>. <span word="devoted">devoted</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="his">his</span> <span word="life">life</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="bringing">bringing</span> <span word="up">up</span> <span word="two">two</span> <span word="generations">generations</span> <span word="As">As</span> <span word="far">far</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="In">In</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="case">case</span> <span word="countryside">countryside</span>，_________________________________________③(在那里空气新鲜，人们友善)．<span word="I">I</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="enjoy">enjoy</span> <span word="so">so</span> <span word="many">many</span> <span word="interesting">interesting</span> <span word="activities">activities</span>，____________ (例如) <span word="fishing">fishing</span>, <span word="swimming">swimming</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="visiting">visiting</span> <span word="old">old</span> <span word="friends">friends</span>. <span word="Such">Such</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="future">future</span> <span word="life">life</span>，<span word="one">one</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="been">been</span> _____________ ④(梦想)． <span word="where">where</span> <span word="air">air</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="fresh">fresh</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="people">people</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="friendly">friendly</span> <span word="such">such</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="dreaming">dreaming</span> <span word="of">of</span> 温馨提示1.巧用词汇，<span word="give">give</span> <span word="an">an</span> <span word="excellent">excellent</span> <span word="picture">picture</span> <span word="of">of</span>，<span word="to">to</span> <span word="begin">begin</span> <span word="with">with</span>，<span word="devote">devote</span>...<span word="to">to</span>；<span word="bring">bring</span> <span word="up">up</span>；<span word="As">As</span> <span word="far">far</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="work">work</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="concerned">concerned</span>，<span word="in">in</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="case">case</span>；<span word="such">such</span> <span word="as">as</span>；<span word="dream">dream</span> <span word="of">of</span> 2．①该句是一个含原因状语从句的复合句，逻辑严密，用词准确，语义连贯。 ②<span word="As">As</span> <span word="far">far</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="work">work</span>...<span word="is">is</span> <span word="concerned">concerned</span>的运用使句子紧凑。 ③定语从句的使用，符合评分标准对复杂句式的要求。 ④倒装句和定语从句巧妙结合，与首句相呼应，体现了语篇的完整性。 一、遣词方面： 1．措辞要贴切具体 试比较下面句子：一个人正在街上闲逛。 <span word="A">A</span> <span word="man">man</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="walking">walking</span> <span word="down">down</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="street">street</span>. <span word="A">A</span> <span word="man">man</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="wandering">wandering</span> <span word="down">down</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="street">street</span>. 通过比较可以看出，前一句不如后一句表达得具体、生动。一个词如果内涵越具体，那么在特定的场景中恰当地使用它,就会收到意想不到的效果。 2．要善于运用短语 短语用得好，会给评卷老师留下深刻印象。例如： <span word="When">When</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="child">child</span>，<span word="he">he</span> <span word="wanted">wanted</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="learn">learn</span> <span word="everything">everything</span>.(普通) <span word="When">When</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="child">child</span>，<span word="he">he</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="strong">strong</span> <span word="appetite">appetite</span>(胃口)<span word="for">for</span> <span word="knowledge">knowledge</span>.(高级) 二、造句方面： 1．巧用非谓语动词 运用非谓语动词，可使文句看起来更简洁，使语言更加丰富多彩，重点更加突出，增加文采。 <span word="I">I</span> <span word="covered">covered</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="ears">ears</span>，<span word="trying">trying</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="keep">keep</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="noise">noise</span> <span word="out">out</span>，<span word="but">but</span> <span word="failed">failed</span>. 2．巧用<span word="with">with</span>复合结构 “<span word="with">with</span>＋名词/代词＋现在分词/过去分词/形容词/副词/介词”结构，常作伴随状语以增加被描绘内容的生动性和情感性，使文章读起来更简洁明了。试比较： <span word="He">He</span> <span word="slept">slept</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="night">night</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="window">window</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="open">open</span>.(一般) <span word="He">He</span> <span word="slept">slept</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="night">night</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="window">window</span> <span word="open">open</span>.(高级) 3．巧用复合句 评分标准中强调使用语法结构的数量和复杂性，鼓励考生尽量使用较复杂的结构，并且对由此产生的错误采取了宽容的态度。如果恰当运用各类从句，就会增加文章的亮点。 <span word="Soon">Soon</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="became">became</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="top">top</span> <span word="students">students</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="class">class</span>，<span word="which">which</span> <span word="greatly">greatly</span> <span word="increased">increased</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="confidence">confidence</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="got">got</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="motivated">motivated</span>.(定语从句) 4．巧用倒装句、感叹句、强调句、虚拟语气句等 使用这些句式可使文章化平淡为生动，加强语气，使评卷老师感受作者的强烈情感，起到升级文章的作用。 <span word="Disappointed">Disappointed</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="felt">felt</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="shabby">shabby</span> <span word="campus">campus</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="poorly">poorly</span> <span word="equipped">equipped</span> <span word="classroom">classroom</span>，<span word="I">I</span> <span word="found">found</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="teachers">teachers</span> <span word="patient">patient</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="considerate">considerate</span>.(倒装句) 5．巧用排比等句式 如能运用一个个排比句、对偶句、不定式或短语，可使文章增色不少，会给评卷老师眼前一亮的感觉。 <span word="The">The</span> <span word="purpose">purpose</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="program">program</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="our">our</span> <span word="school">school</span> <span word="more">more</span> <span word="beautiful">beautiful</span>，<span word="to">to</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="air">air</span> <span word="cleaner">cleaner</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="fresher">fresher</span>，<span word="and">and</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="turn">turn</span> <span word="our">our</span> <span word="school">school</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="better">better</span> <span word="place">place</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="us">us</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="study">study</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="live">live</span> <span word="in">in</span>. 亮点词句： _________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ <span word="full">full</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="warmth">warmth</span>，<span word="love">love</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="laughter">laughter</span>；<span word="show">show</span> <span word="concern">concern</span> <span word="for">for</span>；<span word="If">If</span>；<span word="is">is</span> <span word="more">more</span> <span word="likely">likely</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="be">be</span>；<span word="Otherwise">Otherwise</span>；<span word="Meanwhile">Meanwhile</span>；<span word="are">are</span> <span word="sure">sure</span> <span word="to">to</span>；<span word="Since">Since</span>；<span word="plays">plays</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="important">important</span> <span word="role">role</span> <span word="in">in</span>；<span word="it">it</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="up">up</span> <span word="to">to</span>；<span word="contribute">contribute</span> <span word="to">to</span>；<span word="First">First</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="all">all</span>；<span word="pay">pay</span> <span word="more">more</span> <span word="attention">attention</span> <span word="to">to</span>；<span word="Besides">Besides</span>；<span word="communicate">communicate</span> <span word="with">with</span>；<span word="As">As</span>；<span word="If">If</span> <span word="we">we</span> <span word="do">do</span> <span word="so">so</span> Ⅱ.巧用遣词造句，升级下面文章 留意一下我们的周边，可以发现陪读现象很普遍。请你根据以下要点写一篇短文，内容应包括： 1．简要描述陪读现象； 2．分析父母陪读的原因(2至3个)； 3．发表你对此的看法。 注意：1.词数：120～150； 2．标题已给出，不计入总词数。 <span word="Should">Should</span> <span word="Our">Our</span> <span word="Parents">Parents</span> <span word="Accompany">Accompany</span> <span word="Us">Us</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Studying">Studying</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="School">School</span> _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ <span word="In">In</span> <span word="recent">recent</span> <span word="years">years</span>，<span word="many">many</span> <span word="parents">parents</span> <span word="choose">choose</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="accompany">accompany</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="children">children</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="studying">studying</span>，<span word="which">which</span> <span word="has">has</span> <span word="aroused">aroused</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="wide">wide</span> <span word="concern">concern</span>. <span word="These">These</span> <span word="parents">parents</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="willing">willing</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="leave">leave</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="hometown">hometown</span>，<span word="even">even</span> <span word="quit">quit</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="jobs">jobs</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="follow">follow</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="children">children</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="campus">campus</span>.<span word="Most">Most</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="them">them</span> <span word="rent">rent</span> <span word="an">an</span> <span word="apartment">apartment</span> <span word="nearby">nearby</span> <span word="so">so</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="take">take</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="care">care</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="children">children</span>. _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ _____________________________________________________ <span word="Parents">Parents</span> <span word="consider">consider</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="necessary">necessary</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="offer">offer</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="better">better</span> <span word="living">living</span> <span word="condition">condition</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="children">children</span>.<span word="Meanwhile">Meanwhile</span>，<span word="it">it</span> <span word="enables">enables</span> <span word="them">them</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="keep">keep</span> <span word="track">track</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="children">children</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="academic">academic</span> <span word="performance">performance</span>. <span word="Nevertheless">Nevertheless</span>，<span word="what">what</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="ignored">ignored</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="get">get</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="kids">kids</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="habit">habit</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="being">being</span> <span word="dependent">dependent</span>.<span word="Thus">Thus</span>，<span word="they">they</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="never">never</span> <span word="develop">develop</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="ability">ability</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="self">self</span>-<span word="control">control</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="future">future</span>. <span word="Trust">Trust</span> <span word="leads">leads</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="independence">independence</span>.<span word="So">So</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="seems">seems</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="parents">parents</span> <span word="should">should</span> <span word="create">create</span> <span word="room">room</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="children">children</span>’<span word="s">s</span></p>
页:
[1]