首页 › 趣味英语 › 一名外交官的中国故事

meili 发表于 2022-10-18 20:25:51

一名外交官的中国故事

1989年，我以外交官的身份来到中国，之前的两年我开始学习中文。可这并不是我自己的决定。<span word="In">In</span> 1986 <span word="I">I</span> <span word="joined">joined</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="British">British</span> <span word="Foreign">Foreign</span> <span word="Office">Office</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="degree">degree</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="European">European</span> <span word="history">history</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="languages">languages</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="spoke">spoke</span> <span word="fluent">fluent</span> <span word="German">German</span>. <span word="Naively">Naively</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="assumed">assumed</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="future">future</span> <span word="would">would</span> <span word="lie">lie</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Western">Western</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="Central">Central</span> <span word="Europe">Europe</span>. <span word="But">But</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="course">course</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Foreign">Foreign</span> <span word="Office">Office</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="other">other</span> <span word="ideas">ideas</span>. <span word="This">This</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="out">out</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="sheer">sheer</span> <span word="perversity">perversity</span>, <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="kind">kind</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="large">large</span> <span word="organizations">organizations</span> <span word="demonstrate">demonstrate</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="time">time</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="time">time</span>. <span word="Their">Their</span> <span word="thinking">thinking</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="that">that</span>, <span word="as">as</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="talent">talent</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="languages">languages</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="should">should</span> <span word="study">study</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="really">really</span> <span word="hard">hard</span> <span word="ones">ones</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="were">were</span> <span word="particularly">particularly</span> <span word="keen">keen</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="send">send</span> <span word="young">young</span> <span word="diplomats">diplomats</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="learn">learn</span> <span word="Arabic">Arabic</span>. (<span word="This">This</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="because">because</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="strategic">strategic</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="economic">economic</span> <span word="importance">importance</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Middle">Middle</span> <span word="East">East</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="simply">simply</span> <span word="because">because</span> <span word="there">there</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="large">large</span> <span word="number">number</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="Arab">Arab</span> <span word="countries">countries</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="so">so</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="large">large</span> <span word="number">number</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="embassies">embassies</span> <span word="need">need</span> <span word="staffing">staffing</span>.)我在1986年进入英国外交部。我曾获得欧洲历史与语言学位，能讲流利的德语。我曾天真地以为我会被派到西欧或者中欧，但他们对我却另有安排。外交部的决定也并非完全有悖常情，与所有大机构时而做出的变态决定还不同。他们认为我有语言天赋，应当学习一种真正有难度的语言。当时外交部特别喜欢派年轻外交官去学阿拉伯语。（这并非仅仅出于中东地区战略和经济地位的重要性考虑，也是因为那里有众多说阿拉伯语的国家，因此有同样众多的大使馆需要人手）。<span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="recently">recently</span> <span word="got">got</span> <span word="married">married</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="this">this</span> <span word="stage">stage</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="wife">wife</span> <span word="told">told</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="no">no</span> <span word="uncertain">uncertain</span> <span word="terms">terms</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="she">she</span> <span word="did">did</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="want">want</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="spend">spend</span> <span word="half">half</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="her">her</span> <span word="life">life</span> <span word="heavily">heavily</span> <span word="wrapped">wrapped</span> <span word="up">up</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="fierce">fierce</span> <span word="desert">desert</span> <span word="heat">heat</span>. <span word="So">So</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="needed">needed</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="find">find</span> <span word="another">another</span> <span word="choice">choice</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="prevent">prevent</span> <span word="being">being</span> <span word="forced">forced</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="course">course</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="action">action</span>. <span word="Because">Because</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="studies">studies</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="almost">almost</span> <span word="entirely">entirely</span> <span word="Eurocentric">Eurocentric</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="knew">knew</span> <span word="nothing">nothing</span> <span word="whatever">whatever</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="China">China</span>, <span word="beyond">beyond</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="vague">vague</span> <span word="idea">idea</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="large">large</span> <span word="place">place</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="long">long</span> <span word="way">way</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="east">east</span>. <span word="But">But</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="pretended">pretended</span> <span word="great">great</span> <span word="enthusiasm">enthusiasm</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="career">career</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="Sinologist">Sinologist</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="thus">thus</span> <span word="able">able</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="avoid">avoid</span> <span word="banishment">banishment</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="deserts">deserts</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Middle">Middle</span> <span word="East">East</span>.当时我新婚燕尔，我妻子明确得对我说她可不想下半辈子生活在酷热的沙漠。为了不被派往阿拉伯，我需要个替代方案。我的学问都是有关欧洲的。当时我只模糊晓得中国在遥远的东方，是个大国，除此这些，我对她一无所知。但为了不被流放到中东沙漠，我假装对汉学家这个职业抱有极大的热情。<span word="I">I</span> <span word="enjoyed">enjoyed</span> <span word="studying">studying</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="language">language</span>, <span word="although">although</span> <span word="learning">learning</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="characters">characters</span> <span word="remains">remains</span> <span word="probably">probably</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="difficult">difficult</span> <span word="thing">thing</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="ever">ever</span> <span word="done">done</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="life">life</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="major">major</span> <span word="problem">problem</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="studies">studies</span>; <span word="my">my</span> <span word="first">first</span> <span word="son">son</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="born">born</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="week">week</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="course">course</span> <span word="started">started</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="made">made</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="impossible">impossible</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="concentrate">concentrate</span> (<span word="or">or</span> <span word="sleep">sleep</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="night">night</span>). <span word="I">I</span> <span word="began">began</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="two">two</span>-<span word="year">year</span> <span word="course">course</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="no">no</span> <span word="children">children</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="ended">ended</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="two">two</span>, <span word="as">as</span> <span word="we">we</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="another">another</span> <span word="son">son</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Hong">Hong</span> <span word="Kong">Kong</span> <span word="where">where</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="second">second</span> <span word="year">year</span> <span word="took">took</span> <span word="place">place</span>.我喜爱学习中文，但学汉字可以说得上是我这辈子遇见的最困难的事儿。在学中文时，我遇到的主要麻烦是：开课的第一周我大儿子降生了，当时他使我很难集中精力学习（夜里也很难睡个好觉）。第二年我的二儿子在香港出生。历时两年的中文课程开始时我还没孩子，而课程结束时我已是两个男孩的爸爸了。<span word="I">I</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="spend">spend</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> 1990<span word="s">s</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span>, <span word="a">a</span> <span word="total">total</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="nine">nine</span> <span word="years">years</span>, <span word="in">in</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="children">children</span> <span word="grew">grew</span> <span word="up">up</span> <span word="chasing">chasing</span> <span word="cockroaches">cockroaches</span> <span word="around">around</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="living">living</span> <span word="room">room</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="learning">learning</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="songs">songs</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="our">our</span> <span word="ayi">ayi</span>. <span word="Sadly">Sadly</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="never">never</span> <span word="really">really</span> <span word="learned">learned</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span>, <span word="as">as</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="diplomatic">diplomatic</span> <span word="compounds">compounds</span> <span word="there">there</span> <span word="were">were</span> <span word="families">families</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="every">every</span> <span word="nationality">nationality</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="earth">earth</span> -- <span word="except">except</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span>.90年代我在中国度过了整整九年时间，孩子们渐渐长大，在客厅追着蟑螂到处跑，跟中国阿姨学着唱中文歌。遗憾的是，他们都没有学会中文，因为在使馆区虽说有来自世界各国的家庭，却唯独没有中国的。<span word="I">I</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="always">always</span> <span word="keen">keen</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="limit">limit</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="acquaintance">acquaintance</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="other">other</span> <span word="diplomats">diplomats</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="foreigners">foreigners</span>; <span word="as">as</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="wanted">wanted</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="get">get</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="people">people</span>, <span word="which">which</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="late">late</span> 1980<span word="s">s</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="beginning">beginning</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="become">become</span> <span word="possible">possible</span>. <span word="The">The</span> <span word="criminal">criminal</span> <span word="offence">offence</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="li">li</span> <span word="tong">tong</span> <span word="wai">wai</span> <span word="guo">guo</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="abolished">abolished</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="possible">possible</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="establish">establish</span> <span word="genuinely">genuinely</span> <span word="friendly">friendly</span> <span word="relations">relations</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="people">people</span>, <span word="both">both</span> <span word="those">those</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="met">met</span> <span word="through">through</span> <span word="work">work</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="those">those</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="met">met</span> <span word="through">through</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="social">social</span> <span word="life">life</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="beginning">beginning</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="take">take</span> <span word="off">off</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="newly">newly</span>-<span word="opened">opened</span> <span word="bars">bars</span>.在中国期间，我的交际圈不仅仅局限于外交官和外籍人士，因为我身处中国，我想要了解这里的人。80年代末，中国废除了“里通外国”的刑事罪名，这让我和当地人成为真正的朋友成为可能，无论是在工作中还是在日常交往中遇到的。没了藩篱的束缚，生活也丰富了起来。<span word="From">From</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="start">start</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="found">found</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="people">people</span> <span word="naturally">naturally</span> <span word="friendly">friendly</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="approachable">approachable</span>. <span word="Despite">Despite</span> <span word="Chinas">Chinas</span> <span word="long">long</span> <span word="isolation">isolation</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="West">West</span>, <span word="people">people</span> <span word="seemed">seemed</span> <span word="genuinely">genuinely</span> <span word="free">free</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="any">any</span> <span word="inbuilt">inbuilt</span> <span word="suspicion">suspicion</span> <span word="or">or</span> <span word="resentment">resentment</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="foreigners">foreigners</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="happy">happy</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="meet">meet</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="equal">equal</span> <span word="terms">terms</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="learnt">learnt</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="important">important</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="treat">treat</span> <span word="everyone">everyone</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="met">met</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="respect">respect</span>; <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span>, <span word="like">like</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="people">people</span>, <span word="dont">dont</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="being">being</span> <span word="condescended">condescended</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="by">by</span> <span word="foreigners">foreigners</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="British">British</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="careful">careful</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="this">this</span> <span word="respect">respect</span> <span word="because">because</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="our">our</span> <span word="colonial">colonial</span> <span word="past">past</span>.一开始我便发现中国人天性友好、容易相处。尽管历史上中国曾与西方长期隔绝，但中国人对外国人没有固有的猜疑与怨恨，也愿意和外国人平等地结交。我意识到，尊重每一个我遇见的人非常重要；像大多数人一样，中国人不喜欢被外国人瞧不起，有过殖民历史的英国人更应注意这一点。<span word="This">This</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="particularly">particularly</span> <span word="true">true</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="job">job</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="diplomat">diplomat</span>. <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="diplomats">diplomats</span> <span word="were">were</span> <span word="always">always</span> <span word="highly">highly</span> <span word="intelligent">intelligent</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="professional">professional</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="extremely">extremely</span> <span word="concerned">concerned</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="preserve">preserve</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="dignity">dignity</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="country">country</span>. <span word="Debate">Debate</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="always">always</span> <span word="tough">tough</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="open">open</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="honest">honest</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="usually">usually</span> <span word="concluded">concluded</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="friendly">friendly</span> <span word="lunch">lunch</span> <span word="or">or</span> <span word="dinner">dinner</span>. <span word="The">The</span> <span word="impression">impression</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="got">got</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="these">these</span> <span word="meetings">meetings</span> -- <span word="which">which</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="retained">retained</span> <span word="ever">ever</span> <span word="since">since</span> -- <span word="is">is</span> <span word="that">that</span>, <span word="so">so</span> <span word="long">long</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="treat">treat</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="proper">proper</span> <span word="respect">respect</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="nation">nation</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="culture">culture</span>, <span word="you">you</span> <span word="can">can</span> <span word="say">say</span> <span word="anything">anything</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="like">like</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="always">always</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="able">able</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="completely">completely</span> <span word="frank">frank</span>.作为一名外交官，我忠诚得履行着我的职责。中国的外交官悟性都很强，且具有很高的职业素养，他们竭力维护国家尊严。我们之间的争论常常非常激烈，却又坦诚布公，过后我们经常友好地共同用膳。在这些会议上中国外交官给我留下的印象是，只要你尊重中国和中国文化，你就可以和中国人敞开心扉，畅所欲言。<span word="And">And</span>, <span word="as">as</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="diplomat">diplomat</span>, <span word="there">there</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="always">always</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="danger">danger</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="politics">politics</span> <span word="putting">putting</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="strain">strain</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="professional">professional</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="personal">personal</span> <span word="relationships">relationships</span>. <span word="The">The</span> <span word="worst">worst</span> <span word="case">case</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="this">this</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="terrible">terrible</span> <span word="accidental">accidental</span> <span word="NATO">NATO</span> <span word="bombardment">bombardment</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="Embassy">Embassy</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Belgrade">Belgrade</span> <span word="in">in</span> 1999. <span word="It">It</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="difficult">difficult</span> <span word="meeting">meeting</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="few">few</span> <span word="days">days</span> <span word="later">later</span> <span word="when">when</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="go">go</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Chinas">Chinas</span> <span word="Ministry">Ministry</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="Foreign">Foreign</span> <span word="Affairs">Affairs</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="formal">formal</span> <span word="apologies">apologies</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="behalf">behalf</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="government">government</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="listen">listen</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="lot">lot</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="fierce">fierce</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="entirely">entirely</span> <span word="understandable">understandable</span> <span word="criticism">criticism</span>. <span word="In">In</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="preceding">preceding</span> <span word="days">days</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="besieged">besieged</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="British">British</span> <span word="Embassy">Embassy</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="four">four</span> <span word="days">days</span> <span word="by">by</span> <span word="stone">stone</span>-<span word="throwing">throwing</span> <span word="demonstrators">demonstrators</span> <span word="angered">angered</span> <span word="by">by</span> <span word="NATOs">NATOs</span> <span word="dreadful">dreadful</span> <span word="mistake">mistake</span>. <span word="While">While</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="sat">sat</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="office">office</span> <span word="dodging">dodging</span> <span word="missiles">missiles</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="delighted">delighted</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="receive">receive</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="phone">phone</span> <span word="call">call</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="young">young</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="couple">couple</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="met">met</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="few">few</span> <span word="days">days</span> <span word="before">before</span>. <span word="They">They</span> <span word="expressed">expressed</span> <span word="sympathy">sympathy</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="difficult">difficult</span> <span word="situation">situation</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="said">said</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="hoped">hoped</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="wouldnt">wouldnt</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="prevented">prevented</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="appearing">appearing</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="dinner">dinner</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="invited">invited</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="evening">evening</span>!身为一名外交人士，政治动荡常会影响工作和人际关系。最糟糕的一件事情是，1999年位于贝尔格莱德市的中国大使馆遭到北大西洋公约组织轰炸。事后数日，我代表英国政府到中国外交部致歉，我不得不面对许多完全合乎情理的激烈批评。在这之前，被北大西洋公约组织的暴行激怒的示威者向英国大使馆投掷石头，导致我被围困在大使馆四天之久。幸运的是，当我在办公室躲避石块时，我接到了不久前认识的一对年轻中国夫妇的电话，他们很同情我当时的境遇，并且希望我能如约参加当天晚上他们组织的晚宴。<span word="It">It</span> <span word="cannot">cannot</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="denied">denied</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="living">living</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="faraway">faraway</span> <span word="countries">countries</span> <span word="imposes">imposes</span> <span word="strains">strains</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="family">family</span> <span word="life">life</span>. <span word="Sadly">Sadly</span>, <span word="a">a</span> <span word="lot">lot</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="marriages">marriages</span> <span word="fail">fail</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="careers">careers</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="diplomacy">diplomacy</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="mine">mine</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="them">them</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="got">got</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="much">much</span> <span word="involved">involved</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span>, <span word="its">its</span> <span word="people">people</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="its">its</span> <span word="culture">culture</span>, <span word="which">which</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="wife">wife</span> <span word="did">did</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="do">do</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="any">any</span> <span word="great">great</span> <span word="extent">extent</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="gradually">gradually</span> <span word="we">we</span> <span word="discovered">discovered</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="we">we</span> <span word="had">had</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="drifting">drifting</span> <span word="apart">apart</span>. <span word="This">This</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="fate">fate</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="can">can</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="difficult">difficult</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="avoid">avoid</span>, <span word="as">as</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="can">can</span> <span word="never">never</span> <span word="tell">tell</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="advance">advance</span> <span word="how">how</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="spouse">spouse</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="adapt">adapt</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="strange">strange</span> <span word="environment">environment</span>.不可否认，生活在遥远的国度会给家庭生活带来很大的压力。让人伤心的是，许多外交人士的婚姻以失败告终，我的婚姻也未能幸免。我深深地融入中国人民和中国文化之中，而我的妻子却不是这样的。逐渐，我们发现彼此日益疏离。这是命运，难以避免。因为此前我无法预知妻子适应陌生的生活环境的能力。<span word="And">And</span> <span word="so">so</span>, <span word="in">in</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="development">development</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="common">common</span> <span word="among">among</span> <span word="expatriate">expatriate</span> <span word="men">men</span> <span word="working">working</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="acquired">acquired</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="new">new</span> <span word="wife">wife</span>, <span word="a">a</span> <span word="doctor">doctor</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="traditional">traditional</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="medicine">medicine</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="Chongqing">Chongqing</span>. <span word="We">We</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="still">still</span> <span word="experiencing">experiencing</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="eternal">eternal</span> <span word="ups">ups</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="downs">downs</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="cross">cross</span>-<span word="cultural">cultural</span> <span word="marriage">marriage</span>; <span word="I">I</span> <span word="love">love</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="fu">fu</span>-<span word="qi">qi</span>-<span word="fei">fei</span>-<span word="pian">pian</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="she">she</span> <span word="enjoys">enjoys</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="full">full</span> <span word="breakfast">breakfast</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="sausages">sausages</span>, <span word="bacon">bacon</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="beans">beans</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="weekend">weekend</span>.像很多在中国工作的外籍男人一样，我开始了另一段婚姻。我的妻子是一名来自重庆的中医。现在，我们仍然经历着跨文化婚姻的坎坷与甜蜜；我喜欢吃夫妻肺片，她也喜欢周末早餐里的香肠、培根和豆子。<span word="Now">Now</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="no">no</span> <span word="longer">longer</span> <span word="work">work</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="kept">kept</span> <span word="up">up</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="habit">habit</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="visiting">visiting</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="least">least</span> <span word="once">once</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="year">year</span>, <span word="funds">funds</span> <span word="permitting">permitting</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="still">still</span> <span word="maintain">maintain</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="network">network</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="friends">friends</span>, <span word="who">who</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="important">important</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="me">me</span>; <span word="some">some</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="them">them</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="close">close</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="over">over</span> <span word="twenty">twenty</span> <span word="years">years</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="never">never</span> <span word="found">found</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="difficult">difficult</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="establish">establish</span> <span word="good">good</span> <span word="friendships">friendships</span>. <span word="In">In</span> <span word="fact">fact</span> <span word="some">some</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="friends">friends</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="prepared">prepared</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="tell">tell</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="secrets">secrets</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="themselves">themselves</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="they">they</span> <span word="wouldnt">wouldnt</span> <span word="tell">tell</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="friends">friends</span>! (<span word="Because">Because</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="foreigner">foreigner</span> <span word="knowing">knowing</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="secrets">secrets</span> <span word="doesnt">doesnt</span> <span word="make">make</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="lose">lose</span> <span word="face">face</span>.)现在我已不在中国工作，但只要财力允许，我每年仍然回到中国一次。我与许多中国朋友仍旧保持着联系，他们对我而言非常重要。我和其中一些人已经密切交往了20多年。和他们成为朋友不是什么难事。事实上我的许多中国朋友更愿意向我倾诉心里话，而不是向他的同胞朋友。（因为一个外国人知道你的秘密不会让你没面子。）<span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="been">been</span> <span word="there">there</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="support">support</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="young">young</span> <span word="family">family</span> <span word="when">when</span> <span word="their">their</span> <span word="son">son</span> <span word="was">was</span> <span word="born">born</span>; <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="acted">acted</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="interpreter">interpreter</span> <span word="at">at</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="Sino">Sino</span>-<span word="British">British</span> <span word="wedding">wedding</span>; <span word="and">and</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="attended">attended</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="funeral">funeral</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="lovely">lovely</span> <span word="girl">girl</span> <span word="who">who</span> <span word="died">died</span> <span word="tragically">tragically</span> <span word="young">young</span>. <span word="My">My</span> <span word="friends">friends</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="all">all</span> <span word="each">each</span> <span word="others">others</span> <span word="histories">histories</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="find">find</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="very">very</span> <span word="reassuring">reassuring</span> <span word="that">that</span>, <span word="while">while</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="China">China</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="knew">knew</span> <span word="in">in</span> 1989 <span word="has">has</span> <span word="changed">changed</span> <span word="beyond">beyond</span> <span word="recognition">recognition</span>, <span word="the">the</span> <span word="people">people</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="not">not</span>.在中国，我一直资助着一对年轻夫妇，那时他们的儿子刚出生。我曾在一个中英婚礼上担任翻译，我还曾参加一位可爱可惜英年早逝的女孩的葬礼。我和我的朋友们都熟知彼此的过去。可以肯定的是，虽然1989年后的中国已经变得无法识别，然而，那里的人们始终没有变。<span word="Except">Except</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="respect">respect</span>. <span word="All">All</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="friends">friends</span> <span word="seem">seem</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="have">have</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="enormous">enormous</span> <span word="children">children</span>. <span word="The">The</span> <span word="rapid">rapid</span> <span word="improvement">improvement</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="nutrition">nutrition</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span> <span word="over">over</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="last">last</span> 30 <span word="years">years</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="really">really</span> <span word="noticeable">noticeable</span>, <span word="especially">especially</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="north">north</span>; <span word="medium">medium</span>-<span word="height">height</span> <span word="parents">parents</span> <span word="are">are</span> <span word="producing">producing</span> <span word="boys">boys</span> <span word="growing">growing</span> <span word="to">to</span> 185-190 <span word="cm">cm</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="height">height</span>! <span word="It">It</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="quite">quite</span> <span word="alarming">alarming</span>.唯一改变的是，我的中国朋友们的孩子长得都很高大。在过去的30年里，中国人的营养状况迅速改善，特别是北方，中等个头夫妇的儿子身高可达1.85到1.9米，这简直太令人吃惊了。<span word="I">I</span> <span word="dont">dont</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="whether">whether</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="ever">ever</span> <span word="live">live</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="work">work</span> <span word="full">full</span>-<span word="time">time</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="China">China</span> <span word="again">again</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="am">am</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="fifties">fifties</span> <span word="now">now</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="as">as</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="long">long</span>-<span word="term">term</span> <span word="expatriate">expatriate</span> <span word="friend">friend</span> <span word="once">once</span> <span word="said">said</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="me">me</span>, <span word="China">China</span> <span word="probably">probably</span> <span word="isnt">isnt</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="best">best</span> <span word="place">place</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="grow">grow</span> <span word="old">old</span> <span word="in">in</span>. (<span word="If">If</span> <span word="one">one</span> <span word="does">does</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="benefit">benefit</span> <span word="from">from</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="Chinese">Chinese</span> <span word="network">network</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="family">family</span> <span word="relationships">relationships</span>, <span word="that">that</span> <span word="is">is</span>.) <span word="What">What</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="would">would</span> <span word="like">like</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="little">little</span> <span word="house">house</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="countryside">countryside</span>, <span word="perhaps">perhaps</span> <span word="somewhere">somewhere</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Sichuan">Sichuan</span> <span word="near">near</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="wifes">wifes</span> <span word="family">family</span>, <span word="in">in</span> <span word="which">which</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="would">would</span> <span word="live">live</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="five">five</span> <span word="or">or</span> <span word="six">six</span> <span word="months">months</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="year">year</span> <span word="writing">writing</span> <span word="books">books</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="journalism">journalism</span>, <span word="and">and</span> <span word="spend">spend</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="rest">rest</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="year">year</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="Scotland">Scotland</span>, <span word="which">which</span> <span word="has">has</span> <span word="now">now</span> <span word="become">become</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="home">home</span>. <span word="But">But</span> <span word="once">once</span> <span word="China">China</span> <span word="gets">gets</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="your">your</span> <span word="blood">blood</span>, <span word="you">you</span> <span word="will">will</span> <span word="never">never</span> <span word="get">get</span> <span word="it">it</span> <span word="out">out</span> <span word="again">again</span>.我不知是否还会回到中国全职工作和生活。如今我已年过五旬，一个和我一样在国外工作过的老友告诉我，中国不适合养老（如果在中国没有家人和亲戚的话，的确如此）。我希望在中国的乡间有个小院，最好就在我妻子四川老家那边。每年我在那里住上五、六个月，写写书、撰撰稿。其余的时间我呆在苏格兰，那里是我现在的家。没错儿，一旦中国融入你的血液，你就再也无法割舍。</p>

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