趣味英语故事：英语小幽默(双语)
<p> <span word="Child">Child</span>:<span word="My">My</span> <span word="uncle">uncle</span> <span word="has">has</span> 1000 <span word="men">men</span> <span word="under">under</span> <span word="him">him</span>.</p><p> <span word="Man">Man</span>:<span word="He">He</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="really">really</span> <span word="somebody">somebody</span>.<span word="What">What</span> <span word="does">does</span> <span word="do">do</span>?</p><p> <span word="Child">Child</span>:<span word="A">A</span> <span word="maintenance">maintenance</span> <span word="man">man</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="cemetery">cemetery</span></p><p> 他真是一个大人物</p><p> 小孩：我叔叔下面有1000个人。</p><p> 男人：他真是一个大人物。他是干什么的?</p><p> 小孩：墓地守墓人。</p><p> <span word="Teacher">Teacher</span>: <span word="Would">Would</span> <span word="Shakespeare">Shakespeare</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="great">great</span> <span word="man">man</span> <span word="if">if</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="were">were</span> <span word="still">still</span> <span word="alive">alive</span> <span word="today">today</span>?</p><p> <span word="Student">Student</span>: <span word="Of">Of</span> <span word="course">course</span>. <span word="He">He</span> <span word="must">must</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="great">great</span> <span word="man">man</span>, <span word="for">for</span> <span word="so">so</span> <span word="far">far</span> <span word="nobody">nobody</span> <span word="has">has</span> <span word="lived">lived</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="over">over</span> 400 <span word="years">years</span>.</p><p> 一名伟人</p><p> 老师：如果莎士比亚还活着，他会是一名伟人吗?</p><p> 学生：当然。因为到目前为止，还没有人活到400多岁。</p><p> <span word="Mr">Mr</span>. <span word="Smith">Smith</span>: <span word="Waiter">Waiter</span>, <span word="theres">theres</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="dead">dead</span> <span word="fly">fly</span> <span word="in">in</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="soup">soup</span>.</p><p> <span word="Waiter">Waiter</span>: <span word="Yes">Yes</span>, <span word="sir">sir</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span>---<span word="its">its</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="heat">heat</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="kills">kills</span> <span word="it">it</span>.</p><p> 史密斯先生：服务员，我的汤里有一只死苍蝇.</p><p> 服务员：是的，先生，我知道了，它是被烫死的.</p><p> <span word="Son">Son</span>: <span word="Dad">Dad</span>, <span word="give">give</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="dime">dime</span>.</p><p> <span word="Father">Father</span>: <span word="Son">Son</span>, <span word="dont">dont</span> <span word="you">you</span> <span word="think">think</span> <span word="youre">youre</span> <span word="getting">getting</span> <span word="too">too</span> <span word="big">big</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="forever">forever</span> <span word="begging">begging</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="dimes">dimes</span>?</p><p> <span word="Son">Son</span>: <span word="I">I</span> <span word="guess">guess</span> <span word="youre">youre</span> <span word="right">right</span>, <span word="Dad">Dad</span>, <span word="Give">Give</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="dollar">dollar</span>, <span word="will">will</span> <span word="you">you</span>?</p><p> 儿子：爸爸，给我一角钱。</p>
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