你懂得赞扬别人吗（1）
<p><span word="I">I</span>’<span word="m">m</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="praise">praise</span> <span word="junkie">junkie</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="really">really</span>, <span word="really">really</span> <span word="need">need</span> <span word="those">those</span> <span word="gold">gold</span> <span word="stars">stars</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="I">I</span>’<span word="ve">ve</span> <span word="got">got</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="get">get</span> <span word="over">over</span> <span word="it">it</span>. <span word="One">One</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="most">most</span> <span word="important">important</span> <span word="happiness">happiness</span>-<span word="project">project</span> <span word="resolutions">resolutions</span> <span word="is">is</span> “<span word="Don">Don</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="expect">expect</span> <span word="praise">praise</span> <span word="or">or</span> <span word="appreciation">appreciation</span>.” <span word="I">I</span> <span word="think">think</span> <span word="about">about</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="resolution">resolution</span> <span word="every">every</span> <span word="day">day</span>. <span word="But">But</span> <span word="boy">boy</span>, <span word="it">it</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="hard">hard</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="keep">keep</span>.</p><p>我这个人对表扬上瘾。我真地非常想得到那些金五星。我知道我得改掉这个“毛病”。我最重要的快乐决议之一就是“不要期待表扬或欣赏”。我每天都想着这条决议。但是，这真难做到啊。</p><p><span word="For">For</span> <span word="example">example</span>, <span word="we">we</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="went">went</span> <span word="through">through</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="major">major</span> <span word="household">household</span> <span word="project">project</span> – <span word="and">and</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="mean">mean</span> <span word="MAJOR">MAJOR</span> – <span word="that">that</span> <span word="took">took</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="lot">lot</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="time">time</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="effort">effort</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="part">part</span>. <span word="Which">Which</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="admit">admit</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="accomplished">accomplished</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="minimum">minimum</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="grace">grace</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="tried">tried</span>, <span word="oh">oh</span> <span word="how">how</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="tried">tried</span>, <span word="but">but</span> <span word="I">I</span> <span word="just">just</span> <span word="couldn">couldn</span>’<span word="t">t</span> <span word="muster">muster</span> <span word="it">it</span>.</p><p>打个比方，我们刚刚通过一项重大的家庭决议——的确重大——它耗费了我大量的时间和精力。我承认我是极其没有风度地完成这决议的。我努力过，但是不论多么努力，我终究还是有失风度。</p><p><span word="As">As</span> <span word="I">I</span>’<span word="ve">ve</span> <span word="done">done</span> <span word="before">before</span>, <span word="I">I</span> <span word="begged">begged</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="Big">Big</span> <span word="Man">Man</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="manipulate">manipulate</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="with">with</span> <span word="praise">praise</span>! <span word="I">I</span> <span word="urged">urged</span> <span word="him">him</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="sucker">sucker</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="into">into</span> <span word="doing">doing</span> <span word="this">this</span> <span word="project">project</span> <span word="cheerfully">cheerfully</span> <span word="by">by</span> <span word="heaping">heaping</span> <span word="gold">gold</span> <span word="stars">stars</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="me">me</span>! <span word="But">But</span> <span word="he">he</span> <span word="wouldn">wouldn</span>’<span word="t">t</span>.</p><p>我曾经这么干过，我祈求大男人用表扬来利用我！我鼓励他用赞扬来忽悠我，让我兴致高昂地从事这项工作！但是他不肯这么做。</p><p><span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="way">way</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="happiness">happiness</span> <span word="is">is</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="FREE">FREE</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="craving">craving</span> <span word="for">for</span> <span word="praise">praise</span>, <span word="not">not</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="need">need</span> <span word="someone">someone</span> <span word="to">to</span> <span word="pat">pat</span> <span word="me">me</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="back">back</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="that">that</span>. <span word="I">I</span> <span word="should">should</span> <span word="be">be</span> <span word="the">the</span> <span word="source">source</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="my">my</span> <span word="own">own</span> <span word="sense">sense</span> <span word="of">of</span> <span word="satisfaction">satisfaction</span>, <span word="of">of</span> <span word="happiness">happiness</span>; <span word="I">I</span> <span word="should">should</span> <span word="know">know</span> <span word="that">that</span> <span word="I">I</span>’<span word="ve">ve</span> <span word="done">done</span> <span word="a">a</span> <span word="job">job</span> <span word="well">well</span> <span word="and">and</span> <span word="not">not</span> <span word="depend">depend</span> <span word="on">on</span> <span word="someone">someone</span> <span word="else">else</span>’<span word="s">s</span> <span word="opinion">opinion</span>.</p>
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